Great Expectations

That was a memorable day to me, for it made great changes in me. But, it is the same with any life. Imagine one selected day struck out of it, and think how different its course would have been. Pause you who read this, and think for a moment of the long chain of iron or gold, of thorns or flowers, that would never have bound you, but for the formation of the first link on one memorable day.  ~Charles Dickens, Great Expectations

God is teaching me to rely solely upon Him.  It's a long, hard lesson.  Probably so because of my stubbornness to die to myself and pick up my cross daily.  Did you ever realize what lies at the heart of obedience?  Look again....obedience.  I do not think this is accidental.  I think it's a God thing.  He knew one of His daughters would need a visual help in getting the point of what He means when asking for obedience in all areas of her life.

I've been in a Bible study covering the life of David.  I've found that it has focused on two main parts: David's annointing and Bathsheba.  Often, it refers to being at a crossroads in life.  David stood at many crossroads.  At times he chose the correct direction.  Others he did not.  Yet, God chose to let him live...with consequences.  Always with consequences.
As I was reading a passage along with our Bible study speaker, the words leapt off the page at me.  It was as if I was reading them for the very first time...but I wasn't, so it gave me far greater God bumps (aka goosebumps) knowing it was God speaking directly to my heart from His Word for this very moment in my life.  My Ramah word.  Praise Him for His goodness!

This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: 'I anointed you king over Israel, and I delivered you from the hand of Saul. I gave your master's house to you, and your master's wives into your arms. I gave you the house of Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more. 
2 Samuel 12:7b-8 (italics mine)

How many times have I wanted...hoped...wished...for something more than what I already had.  Do I not believe that my God will provide all that I need.  Do I not trust Him to give me what's best for me?  Have I misplaced human expectations on a great and powerful God? 
God knows my heart.  He knew me before I was conceived.  He knows that I require alot of affirming words for me to believe someone is genuine.  He knows that I think actions speak much louder than words.  Yet, He allows me to hear silence.  He allows me to go on without feedback or follow through. 
I hurt.  I stand at a crossroad...doubt or trust...plow on through or wait patiently.  Oh, the agony of it all...
Then, again, I hear softly in my heart, "And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more."   I can expect the greatest from my God.  He has my back.  I need not let the desire of...affirmation, belonging, acceptance, acknowlegement, whatever...take precedence over what my God has for me.  Whenever I get low on something I need, He will provide.  How much sweeter it will be knowing it came from Him at just the right time!  How much more will His glory shine!  How much greater will be the testimony of His goodness!
My prayer today is to get through each moment until I reach my next milestone, being obedient and completely surrendered to Him and His timing, believing His way is what is best for me.

"This is what the LORD says: 'Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.'"

Jeremiah 6:16